A lot of times when men and women disappoint one another, or worse, get into fights, it' s because of mismatched expectations.
Let me give you an example: my friend Karen just had her first anniversary with her husband. She was very excited, of course. She spent a lot of time shopping for a fun, sexy gift. They went out together for dinner and afterward came home to unwrap their gifts. She' d gotten her husband some cologne and a leather thong she expected him to model for her later that night. He got her a blender. (Needless to say, she wasn' t interested in seeing him in the thong!)
Because Karen expected something fun and sexy, any gift that wasn' t what she was expecting would come as a disappointment. The choice of an appliance in particular communicated to her that her husband thought she belonged in the kitchen making frozen margaritas rather than in the bedroom. Now, he didn' t mean this with his gift (at least not consciously) but that' s the message he sent to his wife.
Now, the idea behind this is pretty straightforward: if you know what a woman expects in bed, you can be fairly sure not to disappoint her! So I' m going to explain three things women expect from you so you can live up to your end of the bargain.
Oral focus
Women love to be kissed. The lips and tongue have millions of nerve endings all waiting to be stimulated. (When you' re with a man or a woman who really knows how to kiss, you can feel it all the way down to your toes!) Touching your partner' s mouth with your fingers is also wildly sexy.
If you don' t kiss your woman during sex, she' s liable to think that something' s wrong that you' re thinking of someone else, maybe.
Some guys refuse to kiss a woman after she' s gone down on him. I have to say, this is the fastest way to losing your oral sex priveliges! If your partner isn' t picky about putting her mouth on your genitals, you certainly shouldn' t be picky about kissing her afterward.
There' s another aspect to this oral focus: too many women complain about lack of oral sex. I personally love going down on women, so it' s hard for me to understand the attitude of a guy who' s afraid of putting his lips and tongue on a vagina. Guys, if you' re not giving your women oral pleasure, she' s not going to be 100% happy in bed.
Furthermore, let me let you in on a little secret: if you go down on her, she' s about 500 times more likely to go down on you! Quid pro quo.
Another thing you should know: it' s okay to talk during sex. It' s even better to talk dirty sometimes. Sometimes women get freaked out when men are too quiet.
Love the whole body!
I' ve been in bed with guys who forgot there was anything more to me than my vagina and my breasts. This is a big mistake even if those are your favorite parts ; )
Women are sensual all over. They don' t want just kisses and touches on breasts and clitoris. Touch the hair, lips, thighs, butts, hands... you get the idea. One great way to do this is with a sensual massage. All you need is some warm massage oil and about 20 minutes try to touch every part of your partner. It' s great to wrap up a sensual massage with a V Cream clitoral massage...
A lot of women have hang-ups about their bodies. Telling your partner that she' s attractive, that you love her body, goes a long way toward making her feel more comfortable with you.
A little patience
Don' t be too eager to finish up. After all, sex isn' t over after your orgasm, guys! It' s important to make sure your partner is satisfied before saying good night. If your erection flags after your orgasm (don' t worry, it happens to most men), be prepared to use your hands, mouth or a sex toy (and also V Cream) to help get your woman off.
Okay, now here' s a related complaint: one of the biggest I hear from my friends. Right after sex, guys either:
fall asleep
get out of bed for a drink or a sandwich
jump into the shower
Wait just a second here! After sex is the best time to cuddle up and be truly intimate. The next time you' re ready to hop out of bed, wait just a few minutes. Talk to your partner and touch her and let her know how you feel about her.
If you can satisfy these expectations, your partner will never feel like my friend Karen did when she unwrapped her anniversary blender!
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